Saturday, July 15, 2006

Lois Lane Is A Hoe, Keyshia Cole Is Ghetto, and DMX Is Schizo

Lois Lane Is A Hoe

Anyone see Superman the movie? So the thing that I took away from the movie overall is that Lois Lane is a hoe! Sorry if anyone hasnt seen it yet, but was planning to. But one of the many storylines was that Lois moved on after Superman left for like 5 years and started a new family. But halfway through the movie we discover that the child that everyone is sure is the new dude's is actually Superman's. The kid goes and does some abnormal shit and throws everyone off! So then it comes to light (w/o being said, of course) that Lois' trick ass musta slept with Superman and the new dude back to back, pretty close timewise and both RAW DOG! Ewwwwwww!!!! Now tell me that aint some Maury shit. I knoooooooooow the original writers of Superman aint have this shit in mind.

Keyshia Cole Is Ghetto

What's to say about Keyshia Cole? "These brats cant sing/and Brittney's garbage/What's this bitch, retarded?/Gimme back my $16!!!!!" - Eminem. So Keyshia made it up outta the hood to 'stardom' and all. Yeah yeah....but Im saying.....like this is her first album. She barely went platinum and she gets her own reality show? I swear I aint even hating. I like Keyshia. But, her own reality show? So soon? It's like when Vibe magazine referred to Chris Brown as the future of R&B before his 2nd single came out. Ummmmm...yall a lil premature, no? Anyways so at the end of Keyshia's show it builds up to a concert she gives in her hometown of Oakland. And of course she ends the show with her smash hit "Love" complete with that god awful, suicide inducing ass note included. Yall know the note, right? So it's like 7 people in the room watching this. Our ages ranged from 14-28. Essentially everyone on this side of 21 cringes when this chick cuts the music off and repeatedly sings the chorus with that ol "take it out in the field and shoot it" ass note repeatedly. *sigh*

DMX Is Schizo

Why is this nigga making himself egg sandwiches in the gas station at 2am? Im saying. Like for real X? What's that shit he said? "I wont take disrespect from nobody! I dont give a fuck if it's a big nigga! A small nigga! Ay....I'll fuck a midget up!!!" LMAO. Apparently this nigga be on that pure grade A shit straight from Bolivia. He'll be screaming on you one sec, then bust into the Lord's prayer before you know it. Yeah....they call that shit schizoprenhia. As far as I know they have medication for it. Ooooh but the funniest part is when the lil white girls rolled up on him in Arizona and kept calling his ass Ja Rule! I thought he was gon chokeslam them lil scallywags. And did you hear their mom on the phone with them. Let that be a lesson to all you people of color. You see what happens when they get all of their knowledge of us from mainstream media?

Fuck this shit.....Im back to reading books.

5 comments:

toneec42 said...

I caught the last 30 minutes of DMX's show. He is definately a little, shall we say, conflicted about who he is. I came in on the little girls on the horses so I didn't understand what the whole JaRule thing was and I didn't hear what the mom said on the phone.

fuckgoogle said...

Dude you post like you got a job or something *jokes* once a week c'mon man u better than that....Is it obvious that I haven't let any of the aforementioned entertain me?

Anonymous said...

co-sign that Lois Lane is a ho skeez bitch for not tellin' her husband that lil' dude aint his.

dude prah'lee married the bitch anyhoo because she was prego.

plus, that nigga superman is a deadbeat dad for skating off for five years after tapping raw.

extra plus, sperman ain't even human so how that nigga got sperm?

supe, supe, supersperm (no brokeback)

they effed up the superman franchise with that wack azz storyline.

NegroPino™ said...

Read any good books latelY? I just finished reading Menage's WAy.....


i got 1 thing to say:

Cocaine is a helluva drug

jendayi said...

LOL! What??!! How do you take a romantic, emotional, fun movie like Superman Returns and turn it into that! lol. Good observation though. That is pretty nasty how sequential her love-making must have been. And I agree with you on the whole DMX thing. That man Is CRAZY!