Saturday, April 30, 2005

This Shit Is About Me!

"My defenses were so great. The cocky rock and roll hero who knows all the answers was actually a terrified guy who didn't know how to cry. Simple." - John Lennon

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Gentle Teej

So Im at my homegirl's crib and her 8 yr old niece is there. U know The Teej loves the kids, and all the kids love The Teej, right? So me and lil miss thang are talking and she compliments my mustache of all things. I crack up laughing and blush at the same time b/c I think it's adorable that this 8 yr old is telling me she likes my mustache. I say "Oh really? Well thank you!" No lie she reaches over and hugs me and says "I like you. You're gentle!" I asked her why would she say that......b/c she just shocked me with this 'gentle' line. And she goes "Well most guys would just say (sticks out her chest and in her best macho man-esque voice says) Oh thanks!".

I was floored. It made me think really. Im glad to be me. With my gentle self *wink*. But I can flip it when need be. But I prefer gentle you know. And it's appreciated. If not by most, by a small few. A small few including my friends, a noted author (read next blog), and an 8 yr old who really count.

bell hooks

I actually did this blog like 3 weeks ago. The post didnt go through though. Anyone familiar with the black feminist author bell hooks? I met her recently. Actually she's my new best friend apparently. Lemme explain.....

I was at working at the hotel when she came in and asked me where the washroom was. I pointed her in the right direction and said to myself 'Damn she looks like bell hooks. Nahhh couldnt be!". 2 minutes later a rep from the Chicago Public Library came to me to double check that the payment of Ms. hooks' room had been taken care of. I said to the lady 'I thought that was her! Im a fan of hers'. The lady was like 'Great! I'll introduce you when she comes back!"

Sure enough when Ms. hooks came back, the library lady walked her over and introduced us. I told Ms. hooks that Im a fan of hers (truth!), and that I have a few of her books (not so truth! lol). I have read a couple of her books, but I borrowed those from friends, but she didnt have to know all that, right? I told her I wish I had known b/c I woulda brought a book to sign. She turned to her friends and said "Oh great ladies. Anthony's on the team!" ( Not sure what that meant...but I cautiously took it as a compliment.) She told me she wasnt leaving til tomorrow and left out with her friends. When I looked her up in the system she was set to leave before I got to work. The next day I didnt expect to see her, but she surely came in while I was there. Her car wasnt picking her up til 5pm. I told her I didnt expect to see her and didnt bring my book of hers from home (another not so truth!), but that I'd run to the Border's across the street and grab something.

And that's what I did. I brought her latest book "We Real Cool (Black Men and Masculinity)". It's all about the black male and what people, even us, deem masculine. OH SHIT....that's right up my alley. If you know know Im not even close to what is perceived to be the typical black male. My sexuality and masculinity has been questioned more times than I care to count, but Im all man. Anyways she was happy that this is the book of hers that I bought. She actually said she hoped I'd get this one. We had a nice talk, albeit brief....about 10 minutes or so. We talked about a bunch of things. She said that I reminded her of this younger guy she dated a few years ago. She's 52. She said that the guy was often ridiculed b/c he was soft spoken, quiet and gentle. People questioned his sexuality b/c of his easy nature. She said it was a good part of the reason she wrote the book. I told her on how I could relate to that. She reiterated how happy she was that I bought the book. So happy in fact....not only did she sign my book... "Anthony! thank you for welcoming me - How lucky I am that men like you exist - In solidarity bell hooks" ................she ALSO wrote her home address in it b/c she wants me to write her when I finish the book! UNBELIEVABLE, right? She left and I promised I would write her when Im done with the book. You would think it ended there but it didnt.

About a week or so after she left....I stop in on my job on my day off to use the phone and I see this huge book in my mailbox. I open it up and it's one of the children's books she had co-written. One of the things her and I had talked about was how important it is to stay in touch with the little kid in yourself. The book is called "Be Boy Buzz". In it she wrote to me " Anthony!! to the boy within - never stop loving him. warmly, bell hooks". Now was that not the sweetest thing ever! Totally unexpected. In fact I dropped her a thank you card in the mail for that one today. So wouldnt you say that she's my new best friend? LOL.

Monday, April 25, 2005

More Various

* My mama of all people is really feeling Ying Yang Twins new song 'Wait'. My 51 year old mama! I on the other hand aint really made my mind up about it yet, but my mama be jamming on the one to it. LOL.

* My aunt called me last week to see if I was 'doing okay'. I thought it was really sweet of her to call and check on me like that. I usually call her to see if she needs anything since I stay pretty close to her and she's in a wheelchair. Triffling me forgot to call her back. She called me again today and I went over and ran a couple of errands for her. She asked me again about her calling me last week to see if I was 'doing okay'. I didnt understand why she kept saying that one little part about if I was 'doing okay'. Then she reminded me that the first day she called, 4/13 was the 2 year anniversary of my father passing. To be honest I knew it was in April, but I couldnt have told u the exact day if my life depended on it. Shit is still a blur really. I dunno if those issues will be worked out really.

* Im pretty sure these 2 asian chicks were checking out my package the other day. I was walking against the wind in my thin ass work trousers when I walked past them. I watched as their eyes fell from my eyes to my crotch. Then their eyes got a bit bigger. LOL. I couldnt help but to crack a huge smile as soon as I got by them. I mean Im not trying to brag or nothing, but the boy do better than okay *wink*

Sunday, April 24, 2005

Mike Jones

Let this be a lesson in what a properly planned buzz will do for you. That and timing....and luck. WTF? Am I the ONLY person listening to this dude? Listen...Im far from a hater, but money IS NOT hot. He wont ever be hot. Maybe his lyrics will improve over time, but as of today Im not hearing what everyone else is. Dude is pretty fucking close to wack. I mean...goddamn if any fucking song is played enough, you'll eventually start to like it. I dont see what the big deal is.

I just read my fifty-leventh article on dude. He was just referred to as a 'rising hip hop star'. No! Little Brother are 'rising hip hop stars'. Not Mike Jones! I'll give credit where credit is due. The marketing scheme of always shouting out ur cell, putting it on t-shirts and wearing them in videos, encouraging folks to call u at anytime is pretty fucking ballsy, and it worked. But again....shouldnt it all come down to the music? Just listen to his verse in his "bass heavy, automobile anthem of the year "Still Tippin'" featuring close cronies Slim Thug and Paul Wall (who by the way has the song's best verse).

Four Fours I'm tippin'
Wood grain I'm gripping
Catch me lane switching with the paint dripping
Turn your neck and your dame missing
Me and Slim we ain't tripping
I'm finger flipping and syrup sipping
Like Do or Die I'm po pimping
Car stop rims keep spinning
I'm flipping drops with invisible tops
Hoes bop when my drop step out
I'm shaking the block with four eighteens
Candy green with eleven screens
My gasoline always supreme
Got doe doe to burn with a pint of lean
It takes grinding to be a king
It takes grinding to be a king
First Round Draft Picks coming
Who is Mike Jones coming
Slab shining with the grill and woman
Slab shining with the grill and woman
I'm Mike Jones (Who) Mike Jones the one and only
you can't clone me
Got a lot a haters and a lot of homies
some friends and some phony
Back then hoes didn't want me
Now I'm hot hoes all on me
Back then hoes didn't want me
Now I'm hot hoes all on me
Back then hoes didn't want me
Now I'm hot hoes all on me
(I Said!) Back then hoes didn't want me
Now I'm hot hoes all on me

What the fuck is up with the repeating of the lyrics? Yo I dunno if that was 16 bars, but that nigga must've wasted 10 with repeat lines. I mean I understand that he's hot regionally. But there are dudes rapping in Chinese in China too. That dont mean they are gonna be the next big thing in hip hop music. Yeah it's cool in Houston, but Texas is a pretty fucking big state. Of course he's popular there. I dunno yall.....the rap game is going down. At least it will if media keeps telling us who to like and who not to, and we listen.

Saturday, April 23, 2005

Agressively Ridding of Thoughts and Feelings

U ever had to literally beat the living shit out of a thought or feeling of yours that you kept forgetting to forget and get rid of? I mean you have wait and catch that thought when it's by itself and then you jump on it's back and
choke-slam his ass? Or you hear that that one feeling that you are trying to get rid of is chilling all out in the open. So you sneak up behind him, take out it's knees and then stump on it's head til it's a bloody pulp!

Yall probably think I've gone crazy, but I havent. Well at least no crazier than I've always been. I mean it's just a metaphor....sheesh!

Friday, April 22, 2005

Who Knew about Fatty Koo?

Anybody see the premiere of BET's new show 'Blowing Up Fatty Koo'? I'll admit I had some initial hesitance about it. I mean first it's BET original programming. And second....I was thinking 'Well what the fuck is a Fatty Koo'?!?!?!?!
Anyways so it turns out the show follows 5 up and coming young ass musicians from Columbus, OH. They get signed by a management company in NY, and from there it's all about the ups and downs of them making it in the biz. My description probably sound a bit blase, but it was not bad at all. Plus they are really talented, and have a good sound. I might even check for them when their album drops in Neverary!

Saturday, April 16, 2005

On Fire

I just ate a whole 99 cent bag of Flamin Hot Cheetos, and to most this would seem like nothing blog worthy....but to those that know me, and know I dont eat anything with a spice attached to it...well yeah there ya go.

My mouth is on fire....up in here....its burning's on fire! Whoooooo! I kinda had the munchies while finishing up my overnight shift at the hotel. Plus I was getting tired. I saw someone had abandoned the bag of Flamin Hots, and I thought the spice would be the perk that I need to get me thru the shift. Well perk me up it did. Goddamn my mouth is burning. How do you people do this shit with any regularity?

Friday, April 15, 2005

India Arie

Anybody seen her new video from the "Diary Of A Mad Black Woman" soundtrack? It's called "Purify Me". Great song, typical India. Great video question is....where the hell did she get all that hair from?

Last time I saw her she had less hair that me. Now she has a head full of micro braids I guess they are called? Like I've never claimed to know all there is to know about hair growing techniques.....but Im pretty fucking sure something is amiss here.

I honestly thought they had shot the video like during her second album or something and just had it in the vaults and decided to use it for this project maybe. Im totally baffled. Really I am, but I digress.

Something I got from the 'net

TEN random thoughts:
10. I need a bigger place
9. Squash is not to be least it shouldnt be
8. Jay Z is my favorite rapper
7. Where is Dwayne from 'What's Happening?'
6. More books please!
5. Until the day that 8x8x8 is 4!
4. Frankenberry Cereal
3. My feet are pretty fucking big
2. There has to be a better way
1. More money would be nice

NINE cities I've been beside my hometown:
9. Miami
8. Dallas
7. Reno
6. Los Angeles
5. Milwaukee
4. Detroit
3. Atlantic City
2. New York
1. Atlanta

EIGHT things I want to do before I die:
8. Travels to places across the Atlantic
7. Build my dream home
6. Publish a book
5. Cure a disease
4. Own a TV station
3. Meet T-Boz
2. Star in a movie
1. Touch as many as a good way of course

SEVEN ways to win my heart:
7. Be patient and understanding w/ me
6. Be artsy
5. Fuck my brains out
4. Be as sweet as pecan pie w/ extra syrup
3. Love music like I do
2. Inspire me
1. Be adventurous! Do crazy shit with me.

SIX things I believe in:
6. God being a woman
5. Love
4. Trying til exhausted, catching your breath, and trying some more
3. Listening
2. Hard Work
1. Me

FIVE things I'm afraid of:
5. Seeing the people I love hurt
4. Drunken white people
3. Sober white people
2. Not having enough time
1. Rejection and Failure

FOUR of my favorite items in my bedroom:
4. Bed
3. Clothes
2. CD's
1. Radio

THREE things I do everyday:
3. Pray
2. Sleep
1. Eat

TWO things I am trying NOT to do right now:
2. Go crazy
1. Spend money I dont have

ONE person I want to see right now:
1. Take one educated guess!

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Exactly What I Dont Need To Hear

Whitney is collaborating with Lil Jon for a track or two for her new album.
And well.......I just think that is very unneccesary.

Funny thing is......I promise you if that shit is hot, Imma probably be bumping it. LOL.


* I just accidentally deleted my last blog about the crazy dream while trying to edit it. One wrong click and va-vooooosh! Oh well...if u didnt read it, ask me about it.

*I hung out with a very good female friend today. We talked about our relationships and various other things. Among those things we talked about the fundamental differences 'tween men and women. I swear to you...the older we all get........some of these differences are just never gonna change. They been going on before we were, and they'll be here long after we're all gone. We had just better get used to them and move on. Really. That's all to it. Acknowledge it, and keep it moving. Make the best of it. For real.

* I almost got hit by a car today. Not fun at all.

* I cheated on my NWOP diet. I had some fries. I also had some veggie burger for the first time ever. I'll have to try those more often.

* It's getting harder and harder to stay motivated to consistently workout. I've been thinking of plastering pictures of Usher and LL Cool J around the house, but then again that idea strikes me as sorta gay.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

It is 2005, right?

As cut and pasted from

"W.Va. Makes English Its Official Language "

By ERIK SCHELZIG, Associated Press Writer

CHARLESTON, W.Va. - Two days after the end of the legislative session, state lawmakers are discovering something few were aware of: They voted to make English the official language of West Virginia.

The language amendment was quietly inserted into a bill addressing the number of members that
cities can appoint to boards of parks and recreation. Among mundane details about record-keeping, the amendment adds the provision that "English shall be the official language of the State of West Virginia."

And so Im just wondering what the hell the official language was prior to this change.

Sunday, April 10, 2005

Today Was A Good Day

And it wasnt b/c nobody didnt get killed in South Central LA. Well I hope no one did...but that still aint why it was a good day.

I hung out with 2 set of friends from outta town. 1 set happens to be a married couple I've known for years. I loved being around married people seeing how they interact, how they give and take, and how they put up with each other's shit.

I found out that I am in the current issue of 'The Ave.' magazine! GO COP THAT! Available at Borders and other fine bookstores.

And I came to work and got tipped a total of $60!!!!!!

Wouldnt you call that a good day?

As stated by Teddy P

"You cant hide from yourself. Everywhere you go......there you are!"

And I just happen to think that that is one of the truest shits every uttered in the history of the world. And so I decided to share. Think on it now......

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Just A Note On Common Sense

A thought just occurred to me.

It seems to me that if I had a lot less common sense than I do, I'd be able to relate to the majority of people easier. And I wouldnt walk away from conversations calling them fucking idiots!

Is It Crazy.....

....that it's 5:47am as I begin to type this, and I just finished assembling a CD rack?

If you know ANYTHING about know I'm a CD freak. Everybody has their something, and mines is collecting CD's/ Let's just say I got a lot. And let's make it clear that I need a better storage method than the cardboard box method I've been working with. Got paid today, didnt lose my mind and buy shit like Im always tempted to do on payday. However I did see this rack that holds 350 CD's for $20! COPPED!

All the while at work, Im thinking on how Imma throw it together and alleviate some of the congestion caused by the CD boxes in my place. So I got in from work around mid-night. Think I went straight to it? Nope! I watched a lil tv, got on the computer, then watched some more tv. So around 4-ish or so Im thinking...I should be going to bed now. But it's never that easy. I somehow get caught up watching an old re-run of 'Cosby' that I already saw. So now it's 4:30-ish and I get to eyeing the box. Long story short I said 'Fuck It'. I dont have to work til 2:30pm so why the fuck not. Took me a lil less than hour.....and now Im going to bed. Holla!

Monday, April 04, 2005


......maybe Im just on my period as my mama would say whenever I got in one of my moods. And Im not even really in a much as I dont really feel like being bothered with people. And when you work at the front desk of a hotel.....well it's kinda hard to avoid people, ya know?

However, be that as it may...Im still on some Michael Jackson leave me alone, you dont fuck with me I wont fuck with you there aint much more for us to talk about, fuck the world dont ask me for shit, get outta my face trick, dame espacio, back up gimme space, I said 3 feet nigga! - shit.

Bougie Candy and The Ant

So about 43 seconds of the snooty ladies from the sales office just came and offered me some bougie ass candy from Italy. I guess the fact that it's from Italy was supposed to make me jump, but I think not. If she had a clue as to how picky I am about what I eat she might've thought twice. But anyways...she comes and offers it to me, and then begins to tell me that she doesnt want it b/c she'll eat the whole thing. So she hands it to me and tells me to try it. Im looking at the box. Its some sorta hard hazelnut nougat. WTF? Anyways she opens up the wrapper to show it to me......AND THERE'S A FUCKING ANT CRAWLING ON IT.

So at this point Im like 'Well Lavi you almost sold me on it (lying my ass off), but this ant seems to like it even more". Swear to God homegirl jumped back like I said it was a snake on it. She starts like wiping herself all frantically and what not. "Yo chill, it's only an ant". So you would think it's over, but it isnt,

The concierge, who's mos def a space cadet, walks over and goes 'oooh candy, can I try?" I'm like "...but there's an ant on it, see?". And I show her the ant crawling all over it. So you know she said she didnt care and swiped the shit out my hand, right?

Alls I know is I aint kissed nothing up to God in a minute. And even when I did....please believe it damn sure wasnt anything that I witnessed another life form crawling all over. Ewwwwwwwwwww

Sunday, April 03, 2005


I did it. I admit it. And I cant promise I wont do it again.

I had some french fries earlier today. Curly fries to be exact. I cant even blame Dave for suggesting we go to Hooters after getting fitted for the tuxedo's.

Speaking of which...can I just say that it makes u feel pretty weird when being measured by the tuxedo guy, he has to measure the length of your shoulder to your wrist 3 times b/c he cant believe he's doing it right b/c your arms are that fucking long!!!!! I swear on something scared the 2nd time money said 'Nah...that cant be right!", and then measured a 3rd time. WTF?

Anyways....yeah I had some fries. And Imma prolly do it again. PLUS.....Since Im at work and barely able to keep my eyes open....Im finna go get a pop. Yeah I said pop. Not soda. Pop nigga! P.O.P.! Southside Chi-town, nigga what? Nigga who? Wzup Joe?

Saturday, April 02, 2005


Even though at times Im knee and sometimes waist deep in the bullshit....THANKFULLY I still see and have the bigger picture in mind. And with any luck, I'll be able to steer myself and those closest to me in the right direction.

Friday, April 01, 2005

Rainy White People

Shiiiiiiit! Im at work. Doing the overnight shift this Friday Night/Saturday Morning...and people, to be more exact... white people keep coming in. As I type this...this one group of 6 middle aged white people have apparently coming in from some show and are standing RIGHT IN FRONT of the front desk discussing how great the show was.

Well that's all fine and dandy, BUT....if you are a person of color...or hell just NOT a white know they have a unique stench when they get rained on. It's a sorta like a mix of a wet dog and my smell gym shoes. Alls I know is it damn sure aint a pleasant aroma. And I dont mean to offend anyone who may happen to be white. Hell yall might not even know. Black people might have a certain smell when we come out the rain too, but since Im black I probably wouldnt notice. But my sometimey ass sense of smell can pick up the a wet white person a mile away. Shit is not cute, son. Not cute at all.