What A Fuckin Day!!!

First of all I start the day with a friend of mine who does Public Relations in NY asking if Im going to the VMA's in Miami on 8/28. Well I hadnt planned on it but I got a strong urge of spontaneity so I said 'fuck it' let's do it. The Teej is spontaneous.....but I never thought I was spontaneous enough to plan a trip to Miami on a fucking whim. So I reserved a myself a room at the sister hotel of my 9 to 5 in South Beach. Executive Suite for $75 per night. Hell fuck yeah.....

I get to work and apparently it was 'Bullshit Day' but no one told me. Not only did the barely month old system that we use to check people in and out of the hotel repeatedly crash on us (Who the fuck chooses to use a web based system anyways when the internet can go down at any given moment...but hey...Im not in upper management), and for the record it has crashed about 3 times a week since we launched it on 7/4..we usually our able to combat it by printing out a list of arrivals for the day and a list of vacant rooms just in case....BUT NOT TODAY! We had noooo earthly idea of which rooms were vacant and/or occupied. So I had to literally go up to rooms to see if they were clean and/or occupied BEFORE we sent the guest that was checking in to the room. Not fun...but I did get away from the desk which isnt such a bad trade off. I did that for about 2 hours til they finally got the system working.

THEN........at some point while Im dashing back and forth between the guest floors and the front dest doing my best FloJo....Anna the lady from housekeeping comes running up to me all exasperated and whatnot speaking spanglish or some shit. Apparently she went to mop in the women's washroom and they was a couple having sex!!!!! Like....Im used to this shit when I do the overnight...but not 4pm in the fuckin afternoon! Who does that? So I get downstairs to the bathroom and like 5 people from housekeeping are just standing around the damn bathroom door. Im looking like "Why did u come get me then?!?!?!". So I knock on the door and I hear nothing. Im asking Anna is she sure that they are still in there, and meanwhile here comes the hotel's GM and the head of accounting. The GM, Thomas knocks on the door and sends Sarah from Accounting in. At this point I turn and walk back upstairs. 2 minutes later I see the guilty couple coming off the elevator that goes to the bathroom. OMG.....Why was it 2 middle aged heavyset red-faced white people????????? WTF? And apparently that wasnt their first time doing this shit!

After the usual rigga-ma-ro (is there an actually spelling of that 'word'?) of a typical day the night seems kinda quiet and somewhat normal. One of our favorite guests checked in. Everyone loves this guy b/c he's a heavy tipper. This dude throws 20's around like singles. He must've handed out $140 before he left the front desk. That's my word! I was mad b/c I had just taken $20 out the ATM. Had I known he was coming I woulda left the dub there. Oh and then 5 mins before I walk out a guest calls down b/c her roof is leaking!! Huh? What? Leaking? As in water dripping from the ceiling. I call the engineer who of course had broke camp like 20 mins ago but didnt tell anyone. So Im forced to call homegirl back and tell her there isnt much I can about it. I offered to switch her room but she declined. Aight then.....peaceeeeeeeee! Hopefully I wont get to work tomorrow and here stories of the roof caving in room 709.

And finally all week I had been getting emails about this new spot opening called Club New York. It sounded nice so I decided to go after work. I took the 8 min train ride to the spot. It was literally 4 stops away on the Red Line. It's supposed be popping from 1opm-2am. I get there around 11:30-ish and what do I find? A BIG ass sign in the window saying the grand opening had been postponed? WTF? I didnt get an email about that shit! The sign also re-directed everyone to this other spot that was 2 doors down. So fuck it....I go up in the spot. Good mix of people and what not. I hit the bar and order a heinkein and walk around and mingle and check out the joint. This sista walks up to me and starts talking. LaShawn I think her name was. Wasnt cute. Wasnt a bear. Just so so i guess. Anyways she introduces me and starts her game. "I just knew you were about to go sit with your wife or girlfriend". LOL. Yo I aint making this up. We're chit chatting it up and she gets closer and wraps her arm around my waist to get closer b/c its loud or whatever. Man.....long story short.....homegirl basically palms my ass and caresses it as she talks to me. And I feel kinda dirty b/c it felt good and I didnt stop her. ROFLMAO!!!!!! Is that so bad? LOL. It only lasted like 20 seconds though. But when was the last time I get my ass groped by a total stranger? That surely doenst happen everyday.