Soulmates?

Last week a friend of mine and I were discussing relationships (lol...been doing that alot lately it seems) and the topic of Soulmates came up. So maybe Im looking at it with a lil too much reality and the such....but the notion of a 'soulmate' is absolutely ridiculous when you really think about it! What is a soulmate? The one person in the world that you were born to be with and vice versa. WTF? Does that really make sense?

Most people live in the same city for the majority of their life looking for their soulmate? If Im in Chicago...how ignorant would I have to be to assume my soulmate was also in Chicago. What if my soulmate is inIceland or some shit. What if they were born 30 years before or after me? B/C you know people always assume their soulmate is in the same age range.

Dont get me wrong....Im probably the most fairytale ending -wishing, head in the clouds, dreaming, sentimental dude you dun ever came across in your life, but the notion of just one person meant for me to truly be with is a bit much. Even for me and these dreaming eyes of mine. Now I do believe that there is somebody for everybody. I believe that if 2 people share enough in common, geniunely care and love each other, and are willing to put up with the others BS (b/c EVERYBODY comes with their own form of BS....whether they change it for the better later or not) then they can make it as a couple. But a 'soulmate'?

Nah son....I aint buying it.......as much as I would love to. Reality just wont let me. For the record...I aint trying to shape no one's opinion or crush anyone's dream. Just sharing my opinion for what it's worth.

Clarity Like A Mu'fucka!

In talking via IM with the Kid Genius Danya...I came up with some 'ingenius, 'thank God for granting this moment of clarity' shit'. And then....being the fucking young Einstein ass that she is...Big D from NYC came back just as strong. Peep...

Teej: cant nobody argue with your own personal view of where u should be or what u should've accomplished by the timeline u gave urself
Teej: just so happens that reality happens how it does...and most times not in line with what we envisioned
Teej: so now the question is....do you fight it? or do you let it go down how it's gonna go down?
Teej: damn see how deep i just came? im finna blog that shit!
Danya: hahaha
Danya: i say fight whatever feels natural to fight
Danya: as in, fight until it no longer makes sense
Teej: true!
Danya: but be inventive with ur approach
Danya: sometimes u have to just go beyond what they were expecting

Apply it as needed, wherever you need to, but that shit is the sho shot truth right there!

Various 6/29/05

*Happy B-Day Big Sis JaniTy! U somewhere shaking ya tailfeather, aint cha?

*I've just spent about 40 precious minutes of my life online searching for a clip of Eve's sex tape. Yup....40 minutes that I wont get back. I must need some or something. LOL. Gosh am I that much of a perv? Yeah......but, oh well! Wouldnt ya know I never found it. I decided that 40 minutes is enough. I'll catch the bootleg DVD at the barbershop or something. Maybe my brother has it already. Okay enough with this....lol.

*Anyone see the BET Awards last night? I thought they were pretty good. Fugees reunion, Will and Jada did the damn thing, (they are the shit. That's what I aspire to be in my relationship....when ever I make that step again.) their skits were funny, the tributes to Ossie Davis, ODB and Rick James (did Teena not go to church up in there?), and Stevie Wonder's performance. Yall see Stevie get up and get his lil rehearsed 2 step on? Did anyone else hold ya breath b/c u thought he was gonna fall on his face too? I had to cross my fingers and turn away when he stumbled a bit. I actually left my crib in the middle of the show and went to Border's for an hour or so. I got crazy inspired outta nowhere while watching. I went to Border's and grabbed like 4 or 5 books on advertising and got my study on. *Currently trying to figure out the ad game to inturn have more businesses advertise on my show* I've heard and read mixed reviews, but I think they turned out pretty nice.

*You know in Mariah's song "We Belong Together" during the second verse where she sings...

Bobby Womack's on the radio
Singing to me"If you think you're lonely now......"
Wait a minute
This is too deep (too deep)
I gotta change the station
So I turn the dial
Trying to catch a break.....

......IS THAT NOT THE REALEST SHIT EVER!?!?!?!? I mean who hasnt been thru something or is going thru something and a song on the radio is just too real for you deal with at the moment and you HAVE to turn the station? Damn I LOVE that lyric! That's the power of music right there.

The Weekend

It's not like a whole lot exciting happened over the weekend...I just needed something to blog about as to not neglect my baby (the blog). So with that said.....here goes....

*Called my Great Granny and wished her a happy 92nd birthday!
*Called my lil cousin Ana and wished her a happy 15th birthday. Its so weird b/c I still remember when I found our her mom was pregnant with her. They sure do grow up fast.

*Had a Friday off for the first time in FOREVER and totally wasted it away. Well not really wasted b/c I did chill out, but I kinda wanted to go out and I didnt find anywhere to go. Ended up meeting my crazy friend who stays around the corner from me at the 24 Mickey D's at 2am. Only thing was the lobby was closed so we had to walk thru the drive thru. We got our food and sat on the lil patio thingy til damn near 3am talking about our respective relationships and whatnot. I tell you.....I love spontanenity (sp?)

*Woke up Saturday morning w/ a toothache! I've never had one of those.....ever! I was told that I should floss b/c there might be some food stuck in my teeth somewhere. Went to Walgreens. Bought floss, mouthwash and Orajel. Tried to floss. Now I remember why I didnt like it as a kid. THAT SHIT IS DUMB! Fucking sawing a string between your teeth? WTF? Most of my damn teeth have gaps anyways. Cant no food get stuck there. (My....this is turning into a blog within a blog, huh?) I might have a cavity. As much candy as I eat it's about time. Im 27 and never had a cavity. Shit....I've only been to the dentist 2 times that I can recall. The last time I went with my brother to get his braces adjusted. I figured since I was there I might as well get my teeth cleaned. The dentist put me in the chair, tilted me back, got started and stopped. Told me my teeth were fine and to keep doing what I was doing. That was like 2001. Fuck....I got a PPO now. I suppose I should go ahead and go, huh?

*Met some out of town friends downtown and did the tour guide thingy. Came home and stripped naked and lounged in the pad til it was time for work.

*Sunday afternoon I got up, ran a couple errands, came home, stripped (if you didnt know it's hot as hell in Chi-Town right now. We're talking 90 plus.......I wouldnt be stripping just for the hell of it.....Shit...who am I kidding....Im damn near a nudist.....in my own home though), and lounged til it was time for work. Which brings us to the present as I type this right before getting off the gig.

*Oh by the way....I called KK just to tell her I love her and missed her. Oh what a fucking sapp I am. Ol sucka fa love ass nigga I tell ya. (LOL......as Barry White's "Never Gonna Give You Up" comes on the satellite station!). She was at the New Edition concert! Probably jammin on the one! Oh well maybe I'll get it thru my thick ass head one of these days. But probably not. U aint know the boy is hard-headed?

And that was my weekend people. Happy Monday to ya. Do something productive. I sure as hell plan to................

Okrah Gets Told No!

LOL!!! How funny is this shit? If you hadnt heard Miss Okrah (My pet name for Oprah) was in Paris and decided she wanted to go to the Hermes (wtf is Hermes? Is this some high-end lady shit? I've never heard of it) store. Only problem was by the time she had gotten there they had juuuuuust closed at 6:30pm. Well Okrah is Okrah. Number 1 on Forbes Rich List. You would think the peoples at the Hermes store would make an exception for her, right? Hell to the Nizzo! Big O politely asked a sales clerk if she could just pop in and buy a watch for her dinner partner that evening, Tina Turner. Homegirl was not budging and told her it was a no go, and then the manager came out and backed her up. Needless to say Okrah was more than miffed, clutched her pearls (Holla JT Money!) and left.

Now the clerk and manager say that they didnt recognize her b/c she wasnt in full hair and makeup. And that's understandable. I dunno if you even saw Okrah before she goes thru hair and makeup, but please believe it's damn near a different person when she's all did up. However, contray to the Hermes clerk and manager, sources say they knew damn well who she was. Apparently they even reportedly told her "We know who you are." Then they also went so far as to say that and furthermore, they'd been "having a problem with North Africans lately."!!!!!!!!!

Begins chant * Awwww shit. Muthafucka Muthafucka! Awwww shit Muthafucka Muthafucka!*

Dont be telling Okrah that you mistook her for a regular nigga! That aint what you wanna do! While she hasnt specifically said she thinks it was an issue of race, she reportedly has told friends "If it had been Celine Dion or Britney Spears or Barbra Streisand, there is no way they would not be let in that store." Which to me sounds the like race card like a mu'fucka! LOL.

Apparently before this whole incident she had ordered 12 of the store's Birkin Bags at about $6500 a pop (WTF? On a hand bag? Are you shitting me!!!!!), and had another on the way. Needless to say she called and cancelled that shit. She also called the President of Hermes in America and told her how she's feeling.

She's also apparently considering talking about it on her show. You know that wildly popular TV show she hosts? Yeah the same one that threw the beef industry in a tizzy when she did a show about how they inhumanley slaughter cattle. You remember? Beef's stock prices dropped like my drunk uncle after he done hit the Wild Irish Rose one too many times. Didnt the beef industry try to sue her for fucking up they shit? Please believe Hermes betta nip it in the bud with her. They dont want those kinda problems from O-Dog.

And The People Collectively Exhale

Yeah right! I probably got about 7 or so diehard readers.Dont fret my good people my blog is doing just fine. Im pretty sure the good folks at Blogger/Blogspot were doing some work and that was the sole reason my blog was unavailable for those 2 or 3 days. No JaniTy...aint no jealous/crazy-deranged woman deleted my shit. LOL. You's a fool for that one sis.

Shout out to my 'Anonymous' readers. I really do appreciate your input.

Testing

This thing on?

What's Going On In The World Today?

* First....what the fuck is with the trend of rappers catching murder charges just as their album is about to drop? What kinda fucked up new marketing ploy is this? First we had Gucci Mane outta Atlanta, and now it's Philly's very own 'Mr. Imma Hustla' Cassidy. Both has news of their murder charges announced within a week of their album dropping. Coincidence? Hmmmmmm. If so Im sure the record labels dont mind. More press and sales for them, right? WTF? I swear...if it happens one more time, we are gonna know that the fix is on!

*When it comes to rappers, having beef is nothing new. It's damn near a pre-requisite these days. BUT COMEDIANS???? What in the fuck? Apparently there are a few folks a bit peevee at Arnez J. He, for some reason, keeps getting accussed of stealing other comedian's jokes. First Steve Brown, the Alex Thomas, and now Rickey Smiley has beef with him. This is what Thomas had to say about his run in with Arnez J. ....."I was sitting in the audience one night at a show and Arnez J. performed one of my jokes. The f***ed up thing about it was when I approached him about it, he said, 'If I knew you were here, I wouldn't have done it.' " Arnez J. claims none of this ever happened. Now Rickey Smiley and Arnez have gotten into b/c Smiley said that Arnez try to go on before certain performers and use some of their bits to intentionally make the latter performer have a bad show. They've went back and forth on radio about each other just like a pair of rappers would. Arnez says this never happened either. I dunno folks. It seems beef is becoming an entity of it's own. Who woulda thunk (yeah 'thunk' is word dammit!) that they would see the day when fucking comedians are beefing?

Inspiration (Blog Buddies)

So with this blog thing Im able to vent, bitch, moan and cry about any and every thing on my mind. And in the year or so that I have been doing this blog I've actually mananged to attain some regular readers. A few of these readers have actually started their own blogs and credited lil ol me with being the inspiration. How fucking cool is that? Isnt that what life is all about anyways? Touching people? Affecting their lives in a positive way? As Nikki G once said....

"and if ever i touched a life i hope that life knows that i know that touching was and still is and will always be the true revolution"

And with that said Im gonna shout out my regular blog readers that I know of.....in no particular order of course.......Lord help me if I forget anyone...........

Millie Mae - Cuz-o you are the realest. I swear your blog is absolutely THE funny shit ever. I'm thinking we need to write the ultimate smart-assed, witty movie. I believe you owe me some art work too!

Lexy - U know what it is. The powers that be need to not let us put out heads together too often. They oughta be glad we arent in the same city. We'd fuck some shit up, huh?

JaniTy - Where to start? Have we not helped each other along the way? You give me silverware that I oh so desperately need, I give you Stevie lessons that you dont need as much as we thought did. Almost a fair exchange I guess. LOL. When do I get that magazine stand? You are beautiful and you BETTA know it!

Amina - Wise beyond your years my dear. Reminds me of a younger me. LOL. I'll try to refrain from 'coming at you wrong'. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. Blog more, okay?

Reese - Are we a pair of tortured souls or what? I'm sure b/c of the fact that our spirits are in the right place we will end up where we oughta be. Bank on it. BTW....you should look into changing your blog layout. It hurts my eyes when I read it. LOLOLOL.

Ashley - I mean how much more can 2 people have in common? Love for music, in the entertainment industry, going thru our love battles, etc. Except for I dont sleep with a Tickle Me Elmo. Never have, never will. *smile* We are individualistically individuals even with our crazy idiosyncrasies. And that's all we need to be, right?

Junie - Arent we soooo 'here'? What the hell have we ever disagreed on? I really appreciate all of the talks and the wisdom and coaching and whatnot. Let's see if your predictions are right. I surely hope so.

Chelly - Could anyone be more of a typical Aries than you? Such a sweetie....but stubborn as shit!!!!! LAWDHAVEMERCY!! My oh my we've had some deep convos over the years, havent we? Thanks for the wisdom. Didnt I write a blog with a title like that? U gotta use your blog more too!

Nelly - We've been cool since before the blog thing. Glad you made one to share you P.O.V. too. Write in it more, will ya? Here's to hanging out all hours of the early morning, watching all sorts of movies and hitting like 3 or 4 spots in one night! Im thinking we should do all those more often until one of us finds a new or get back with our significant others.

Gentle - U still come by here? Im inspired by your creativity. I wanna be like you when I grow up you deep house head you! *smile* Please please please tell me when the book is ready. Im soooo anticipating it. Promise to sign my copy?

Lola'Rola - U 2! Still come by here my Scorpio Sister?.....Every since that one picture you posted of you with your finger up your nose I knew we were gonna be friends. Good luck on the move to NYC. I still want my Billie painting too! I aint forgot!

KK- If I truly know you at all I'd guess you'd just as soon wish I had left you out of this particular blog. But then again...I also think you'd be just a tad hurt if I did. What can I say? Im talking inspiration here. And I know you read this, and you definitely have inspired me to do alot, so there ya go. I'm gonna be a better man b/c of you. Now if that aint inspiration I dont know what is...............

What Hunger And Brokeness Will Do To Ya

If someone woulda told me that it would come to this....I would never have believed them. If you know me you know I dont experiment with food. I like what I like and dammit that's it! You'd be hard pressed to get me, THE TEEJ, to try something new. And with that said...I am totally blaming the reason for this particular blog on the fact that I am broke with it being approx. 5 days from payday.

I, Anthony (TJ) Armour Jr (yup....thats the full gub'ment issued name if you didnt already know!) being of sound mind, hereby admit that I knowingly and willfully ate Deer.

Hey! I mean what do you peeople want from me? The conceirge (yup the same conceirge that ate the ant infested bougie candy) ordered the shit from the cafe, and decided that she didnt want all of it. It smelled good and I asked what it was. "Venison" was what she replied. "Say what? What the hell is that?" was what I said. "Deer" was how she retorted. And at this point I had a decision to make. The shit looked good, smelled good, and my stomach was talking to me. "Oh what the fuck! If I were stranded in the woods for 3 days I wouldnt second guess eating some damn well cooked deer" is what I thought. And so I did the shit. Yeah I did it. It wasnt bad. Cant say I'll be eating it weekly or no shit, but it wasnt bad. That's my story and Im sticking to it!

' FUCK YO COUCH NIGGA! '

ROFLMAO! Aint really nothing to blog about under that title. The shit was just on my mind and it made me laugh. I shole do hope Dave gets things to where he can work again and gets that 3rd season on the road. Imagine the amount of indignitation it takes to kick someones brand new white sofa with your muddy boots! That shit is hilarious!

Good Ol Fashion Soul Food

Paul Harvey Writes:

We tried so hard to make things better for our kids that we made them worse. For my grandchildren, I'd like better.

*I'd really like for them to know about hand me down clothes and homemade ice cream and leftover meat loaf sandwiches. I really would.

*I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated.

*I hope you learn to make your own bed and mow the lawn and wash the car.

*I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen.

*It will be good if at least one time you can see puppies born and your old dog put to sleep.

*I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in.

*I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother/sister. And it's all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room,but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he's scared, I hope you let him.

*When you want to see a movie and your little brother/sister wants to tag along, I hope you'll let him/her.

*I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely.

*On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope you don't ask your driver to drop you two blocks away so you won't be seen riding with someone as uncool as your Mom.

*If you want a slingshot, I hope your Dad teaches you how to make one instead of buying one.

*I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books.

*When you learn to use computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract in your head.

*I hope you get teased by your friends when you have your first crush on a boy\girl, and when you talk back to your mother that you learn what ivory soap tastes like.

*May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on a stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole.

*I don't care if you try a beer once, but I hope you don't like it. And if a friend offers you dope or a joint, I hope you realize he is not your friend.

*I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your Grandma/Grandpa and go fishing with your Uncle.

*May you feel sorrow at a funeral and joy during the holidays.

*I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through your neighbor's window and that she hugs you and kisses you at Hannukah/Christmas time when you give her a plaster mold of your hand.

*These things I wish for you - tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness. To me, it's the only way to appreciate life.

*Written with a pen. Sealed with a kiss I'm here for you. And if I die before you do, I'll go to heaven and wait for you.

Am I Thinking On This Too Hard?

You know that saying "Love as if you've never been hurt. Dance like no one is watching. Work like you dont need the money."???? Well a thought occurred to me. Something aint right with it. The first 2 parts seem on point, but that third part..."work like you dont need the money".....something just aint right about that one. Follow me now.....

Please believe me when I say that you DO NOT want me working like I dont need the money. First of all...if I dont need the money, then why the fuck am I working? For fun? Hell nall fool! I am actually working b/c I do in fact need the money. If I had $40 milion in the bank and I didnt need the money Im not too sure I'd be necessarily giving an 'A' effort at the workplace, feel me? That aint what you want Roland! You want me working my ass off! You want me working like Im being monitored out that bitch. That's how you want me working.

Anyways I say all that to say that that part of the saying should be changed to "Work like you need EVERY stinking penny of the money" Does that make sense to anyone else or is it just me?

C'mon Black People!

Im damn near speechless....you know only niggaz, right?

Gotta Be More Than Coke!

This fool has to be on some premieum high powered Cali shit! Who the fuck in their right mind would show up to a court of law where they are accused of murder and on trial for their life looking like this? You know what this hairdo says in a courtroom? It says "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury...let me just cut to the chase as to not waste any more of your time and tax dollars. I Phil Spector am obviously insane here. I mean look at me. I did this on purpose, you know? Just go on ahead and do us all a favor and send me to jail. Thank you!" How does one of caucasian decent get their hair to do this anyway? Seems to me it is pre-meditated. He put some thought (albeit some crazy deranged thought) into this. And Im thinking he had to apply some sorta gel or holding spray. Can you see him in the mirror in the morning prepping for court patting his shit trying to get it to look 'right'? What's going on in the world today? I ask you!