80's/90's Party

It's like 3am and I just came home from a fresh ass 80's/90's house party thrown by my boy Zell. Actually it was 85-95! We're talking clothes, food, music...the whole nine. Ya boy showed out in his retro Puma shirt and red trucker hat. But of course I couldnt stop there, right? In addition to the Puma and trucker hat jump off I had to break out the red and white converse kicks. Yeah I know I had contradicting brands but it was the best I could do w/o going out and spending more money that I dont have, feel me? Anyways so we were jammin on the one all night to the sounds of Wrexx N Effexx, Guy, EPMD, Jade, Ice Cube, etc. Everybody did the damn thing as far as fashion. My man Leo broke out the Karl Kani sweater and Jodeci boots. Jamillia had the 'Unbutton Your Fly' tee shirt with overalls and condoms safety pinned on ala TLC. Big Drew came with the Naughty By Nature hockey jersey and overalls. Zell brought out some ill ass old skool Michael Jackson buttons. We're talking 'Thriller' Mike. And I know that 'Thriller' was before the era we were celebrating but shit.....its whatever. 'Los came thru with the ill Dominique Wilkins part in his hair. Thats committment there folks. I actually thought about parting my hair but I have to work in the morning....wouldnt have been a good look, ya know? In addition to the clothes you know niggas acted a fool with the food and drink, right? 40oz's. Boone's Farm. Wild Irish Rose. Chic-o-stic's. Remember the penny cookies with the strawberry frosting on top? Why did I walk in the house and a whole jar of them shits was sitting on the counter? Man listen.....I think I ingested about 168 of them easily. Man a good time was had by all. I wasnt in a dancing mood so I didnt participate in doing any of the old dances but trust that they brought back EVERYTHING.

Oh and I had to take it here...
What you know about having ya friends name on your jeans with a marker? I can afford to do this shit now b/c Im grown! I bought these jeans!!! Remember back in the day you'd get your ass beat for some shit like this?

De Ja Vu (I've Been Here Before)

Im young and Im old...Im rich and Im poor
I feel like I've been on this earth many times before
Once I was a white gazelle on horseback riding free
Searching in the darkness for a piece of me

I can feel this for sure....I've been here before
I can feel this for sure..for sure...for sure...I've been here before

I used to be a king you know...On an island by the sea
With rainbow colored people....Happy as can be
We never had a problem...There never was a care
The love was everflowing...and it's feeling shared

And I can feel this for sure..........I've been here before
I can feel this for sure...for sure...for sure...I've been here before

Yes I have...I can feel it...
I can feel it...In my heart I feel it!

My soul feels like a universe...the basking never ends
Stars to me are children...babies are my friends
My heart is like a galaxy...within my spirit flies
I've felt this way a million times...please don't ask me why
The question of my lifetime...you've asked my point of view
They say it all was karma...Call it deja vu
Call it deja vu...Call it deja vu...Call it deja vu...Call it deja vu

And I can feel this for sure..........I've been here before
I can feel this for sure..for sure...for sure...I've been here before

If hate is on your mind...and u can't love the time
If anger is your friend...Don't you know when you die you'll come back again?!?!?!
If in the master's plan...you come back woman or man
If your life is full of sin...don't you know when you die you'll come back again?!?!?!
I thank God... thank God...thank God...I am not coming back no more!!
I've been here before...thank God...thank God...thank God!
(I don't want to come back no more!)

-Teena Marie

Ye Yo

Sometimes....
Sometimes I get so lonely lonely lonely
I feel all by myself up here
That's when I take a minute
To re-evaluate
All of the things I think are special
Oooh like when you wake up in the morning
And you see the morning sun
And you need to know the world is on your side
Who do you run to?
Who can you turn to?
Come on....
Then the evening comes to greet you
You need someone to hold you close
And you feel you need to rest your aching mind
Who can you run to?
Who can you turn to?
Well see the sun's in the east and the moon reflects
Like the knowledge and wisdom that I manifest
If you wanna go to heaven lay up on my breast
I'm ye yo....your ye yo
I say the sun's in the east and the moon reflects
Like the knowledge and wisdom that I manifest
If you wanna go to heaven lay up on my breast
I'm ye yo...your ye yo...
Ye yo... ye yo...ye yo.....

-Erykah Badu

Stay Cool

I say COT DAMN! It's one of them 'Do The Right Thing' days up in Chi huh? They say it's supposed to hit like 102 or something. Meanwhile in Phoenix they are wishing for a 102 day. They fucking pushing 120! Man...stay cool, up under the AC , and keep some water and whatnot up in ya. As for the kid....Im ass naked with the fan in spitting distance of me. It's just like that.....

Name Calling

"You got a bad name like Dick But-kis!" - The Alkaholics

Can we talk about bad names for a minute? I went to the post office today to send a package and this young sista helped me out. She was soooo nice...and kinda cute I might add. But when I focused in on her name tag I couldnt believe my eyes. Swear on everything I love her name tag read.......are you ready for this?........'Leroinette'.

Yup 'Leroinette' I said! So that means her father was really feeling himself. So much so that he decided to incorporate his name in his baby girl's name. Maybe her pops had nothing to do with it. Maybe a 'Leroi' was somehow influential in her mom's life...so much so she wanted it in her daughter's name. In any event.......'Leroinette' is simply not gonna do it for the 100's people.
The girl couldnt have been no older than 25. Aint no telling how many times her application was discriminated against b/c of her name.

Same thing with my friend from high school. Her name is Antaquila. Then I have another friend who recently got married and took her husband's name which is 'Ogeto'. Uh huh....it's pronounced just as it looks.

This blog really doesnt have a particular point. If any I guess Im just saying if any of you have kids in the future just remember to straddle the line between unique and ghetto. Your kids will most certainly thank you later.

Reluctant Responsibility

FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! FUCKEDY FUCK FUCK!!!!

Sorry about the expletives (actually Im not really, but hey). I just came to the sad sad realization that I more than likely WONT be getting my ipod when I get paid tomorrow. You see my good people....as baaaaaaaaaad as I want it, I realize that I have higher priorities. And quite simply it would be very foolish of me to ignore these financial obligations for a simplistic want. I sure as hell picked a good time to be responsible huh?

I've decided that I can in fact work out w/o the ipod. I've noticed that I've been tired for absolutely no reason lately. If that aint a clear sign that I need to get my ass off the couch I dont know what is. This is soooo wack that I wont be able to get my ipod though. What's even wacker about it is I have a check that Im expecting any day now, and $140 in loaned out money that I have no earthly idea of when I'll see back. If I can get both that check and that loaned out money I'd be on to something.....but these are black folks Im dealing with so who knows when I'll see that cash.

Man this really sucks. Yall have no idea of how much I really want this lil fucker.

Reality TV

So much going on in the world of "reality" tv these days.

Anyone peeped 'Being Bobby Brown' yet? FUH-KIN-FUN-KNEE! I'll be damned if him and Whitney not THE most in love ever crackheads your eyes will ever bare witness to. Funny thing is I admire their love for each other......minus the crack of course. You can tell that they are gonna ride together forever. They got some typa crackhead commraderie or some shit. Of course the show is a ratings hit for Bravo. It actually set a record for the network so you can look forward to another season or 2 at least. Lord knows Bobby needs to earn his keep and bring some income coming in, ya dig?

Another show I can tell Im gonna be keeping an eye on is this season's 'Surreal Life'. We got Omarosa (by the way she divorced her hubby so she's just 'Omarosa' now), Pepa from Salt-N-Pepa, Janice Dickinson, Balkie from 'Perfect Strangers', and Jose Canseco among others. If you saw the season premiere then you already know Janice Dickinson has the most severe case of ADD ever known to man. That bitch didnt put two cohesive sentences together I dont think. And apparently she may be extremely bi-polar too? Anyone see this can back me up. Balkie from Perfect Strangers may be a perv. Everyone wants to fuck Canseco's ol tight speedo blue jean wearing ass. Oh it's gon be some shit. I'd advise everyone to stay tune to this one.

I might get into 'Celebrity Fit Club' only b/c Jackee and Tocarra are on there. And this season's 'Real World' just may be wack again. Yall know how 'Real World' goes back and forth. One season it's the shit, and the next you barely remember it's on. Anybody else peep and reality tv worth mentioning?

And btw....for the record....I fucking hate reality shows, but Im human. And the curiosity factor pulls me in from time to time too.

I LOVE THIS QUOTE!

"Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity"

I dunno the author of this particular one...but I'll be damned if this shit aint on point!

Quote Answers

LOL....Shout out to JaniTy and Millie Mae for even trying. Did I stump yall? Or is it that no one even cared? LOL.....Junie you didnt even give it a go. LOL......If anyone cares....here's the answers in order....

Do The Right Thing
Martin
Cornbread, Earl & Me
Lethal Weapon
Friday
Bad Boys
House Party
Carmen Jones
School Daze
Im Gon Git You Sucka
The Cosby Show
The Color Purple
Boomerang
Juice
In Living Color
Player's Club
Boys In The Hood
Good Times
Pulp Fiction
Love Jones

I's A Fat Lazy Pig!

Im almost ashamed to say that I havent seen no parts of the gym since right BEFORE Jamaica. And if you've been reading this here blog you know that Jamaica was like the last week of May. Which makes that about 6 or 7 weeks ago, which in turn makes me a fucking fat ass lazy pig! At least by own calculations anyways.

Part of the reason for this long drought is.......for some reason I've convinced myself that I simply CAN NOT do anything remotely athletic until I get an ipod. You may ask yourself 'What the fuck does that have to do with anything?" Well I'll tell ya. It is impossible for me to work out without some music. In fact....there isnt much that I get done in my life w/o music accompanying me. I wash dishes to it. I clean the crib (occasionally...with my bachelor ass) to it. I sometimes shower to it. I walk to it.....well you get the point.

Up until my last work out...I had been using a tape player to work out with. A CD player is just too big for me, but all the damn tape players keep fucking breaking on me! I promise that my last one was like the 3rd one I had bought. So while in the mist of my drought it occurred to me that I need an ipod. Very compact, and I betcha the bitch wont break on me. At least it had better not. So there...I am scheduled to buy my ipod come hell or high water on the 20th and even sooner if these lil nigg-lets pay me back the monies in which I loaned their triffling asses.
So the Fat Lazy Piggy of a Teej can get his ass off the couch and get it cracking before I wont be able to see certain parts of my anatomy b/c of my belly. And we cant have that, ya dig?

What's Ya Quote Game Like?

Some you'll know. Some you'll just figure that I have too much time on my hands....and you're probably right.

"Give me 20 D Energizers...Not C, D...D motherfucker, D. Learn to speak English first, all right?"

"That aint no damn puppy!!!!!"

"Oooooh Mr. Fred! You lying Mr. Fred!"

"Free South Africa ya dumb son of a bitch!!!"

"The fuck you stealing boxes for? What you trying to build, a clubhouse?"

"She's a masseuse! That means she massages shit!"

"I'm from a small town called "Fresh Off a Cop's Ass", and you're making me homesick. "

"'Scuse my dust, gentlemen. The air's gettin' mighty unconditioned 'round here."

"You're just a jig-a-boo, tryin' to find somethin' to do!...........Well, you're a wanna-be, wanna be better than me!"

"Yes, we marched on the Federal building. Five hundred of us, young brothers, full of outrage.......They were hiring that day.......The brothers came with outrage; they left with jobs. Oh yes....the white man is very tricky."

"My arms are the same length....why arent my sleeves?"

"Nettie and my kids be comin' home soon, and when they get here we gonna' set around and whip your ass."

"I been working here about 8 days, been on time most of the time even when it rains. Don't you think it's about time we talk promotion?"

"Fuck you gon do? Shoot me in a elevator?"

"Hello Ms. Jenkins! Mmm, mm, mm. That's one fine woman there. Yes sir. Better NO one say nothin' bad about Ms. Jenkins. Uh-uh. Course her breath smell so bad it could singe your nose hairs. But I ain't one to gossip, so you aint hear that from me."

"Yo cousin's a ho!"

"Scared now, ain't you? I like that. That's why I took this job. I hate little motherfuckers like you. Little niggers, you ain't shit! I could blow your head off with this Smith & Wesson and you couldn't do shit. Think you tough? What set you from? Look like one of them Crenshaw mafia motherfuckers."

"Dad, Mr. Garrett wants you to fix his alarm clock. He needs it back by Tuesday night, so he can get up on time to collect his unemployment insurance!"

"Say what again. SAY WHAT AGAIN. I dare you, I double dare you, motherfucker. Say what one more goddamn time...."

"Im going to get some mu'fuckin' Toasted Oats......you tripping!"