Tuesday, December 26, 2006

The "A White Guy Named Lamont" List

1. "In a trap/Trip I can't grip/Never thought I'd be the one who'd slip/...She fuckin' hates me!" - Puddle Of Mud "She Fuckin' Hates Me"
2. Though that could be a bit premature...it certainly feels that way
3. The fact that my Gummy isnt talking to me literally has me nasueous
4. But I think that says alot
5. You ever ran across a white guy named 'Lamont'?
6. Think you ever will?
7. Wouldnt that be a cool rock band name though?
8. 'A White Guy named Lamont'
9. Im gon start that band....Wait....Common had 'A Black Girl Named Becky'
10. Maybe they can tour together
11.
"Rebelliousness is sooooooooooo okay in my book" - Teej
12. Long live the rebels
13. Death to the conformers
14. "Im a leader/yall on some following shit!" - Lil Kim "Quiet Storm"(Remix)
15. I totally forgot to put deodorant on the other day
16. Shit just happens ya know?
17. There are some days where I'll look up and it's like 5 or 6pm and I cant remember if I brushed my teeth that day to save my life
18. Dont worry....I usually did most times
19. My memory is baaaaaaad I tell you
20. "Remember you?/Bitch, I forget MY last name!" - Redman "I'll Bee Dat"
21. That line is classic yo
22. For the most part I've had my fill of Christmas music
23. Im sure thats related to the fact that Ive heard the same 17 Christmas songs over and over and over again during my shifts at the hotel
24. Yet I've heard The J5's "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" no more than 5 times Im sure
25. Only heard The Emotions' "What Do The Lonely Do On Christmas" once
26. But I've heard punk ass Bing Crosby's "Im Dreaming Of A White Christmas" like 690254397188 times
27. "I dont know karate/but I know 'ka-rrrrrazy'" - James Brown "The Payback"
28. Now tell me that aint the realest shit ever uttered
29. RIP James Brown
30. Remember when Michael Jackson came out and put the cape back on James at the BET Awards?
31. That shit was fresh!
32. Speaking of which...you probably didnt know Michael Jackson's "Thriller" was originally gonna be called "Starlight"
33. And I betcha didnt know that "Thriller", Celine Dion's "Falling Into You" and Alanis Morrisette's "Jagged Little Pill" are the only 3 albums in history to stay in the Top 10 of the Billboard 200 for over a year
34. This is the type of shit I learn by reading thru wikipedia.com while killing time at work
35. Oh and least we forgot that while "Thriller" ranks as the 2nd best selling album in US history(behind The Eagles Greatest Hits), it is the best seller of all time around the world with over 104 million albums sold
36. Dont say I aint never learned ya asses nothing
37. "My love is surely one thing/you can surely depend on/In times of darkness and fear/I go to you I know you'll make me strong/You're gonna make me happy/and you're gonna make me smile/Cuz our love will stand tall as the trees/Our love will be for the whole world to see/Our love will change people wrongs to right/And we'll never die/cuz we'll always have each other" - Natalie Cole "Our Love"
38. Yup....thats the type of shit I want
39. That's the type of shit I will have
40. Whomever she is I hope she knows how she's about to luck up
41. This toddler that was in the hotel with his parents kept falling b/c he obviously is just getting the hang of this walking thing
42. And there's really no point to that other than the fact that he was trying to walk with his legs spread far about which was pretty cute
43. Makes me almost want one....
44. .....but then I have to tell Angela to turn the TV down for like the 5407569133576th time and so Im cool off that
45. Who knows though?
46. "....to unnecessarily go thru these changes/And I dont even know how it came to this/....When you could look in the mirror like 'There I Am' and/Still not see what you've become/I know Im guilty of it too but not like them" - Jay-Z "Lost One"
47. Sometimes dont you just feel like 'fuck it!'?
48. I do too but most times I dont mean it.....I care too much
49. In case you didnt notice....this one is going past 50 people!
50. FYI to anyone in doubt : SEXY NEVER LEFT!
51. This "Bringing Sexy Back" shit is starting to irk me
52. I know a few sexy mofo's and they been here the whole time!
53. Am I the last person on earth to see this "Dick In A Box" skit?
54. Im sure I'll get around to getting my speakers fixed soon
55. Anj I want my basket of goodies...this anticipation is too much
56. "Oh yeah your Eunice Shantilly blog had me on Wikipedia thinking I missed an important person in history!" - Val
57. Dont worry Val...you were probably outside playing and being active while all of us Eunice aficiandos were sitting in front of the boobtube having faceless rarely spoke of characters impressioned upon our brains for a lifetime
58. Could that sentence have been any longer?
59. Where the hell is my Angel Grant CD?
60. Am I gonna have to buy it for the 4th time?!?!?!
61. For the record....I love my new iPod Nano
62. It really is the hottest
63. Okay Im babbling now
64. Oh shit!....This might be the 5th time I've heard it thus far
65. "I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus! I did! I really did, and Im gonna tell my dad!" -Michael Jackson "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" (Jackson 5)

3 comments:

Lesley Jean said...

1. Dude... that used to be my shit. Well, me and my friend Amanda. When we were getting divorced we used to sing that shit at the top of our lungs!!

3. Not speaking sucks. I hope things get patched up.

5. Hell no. Dude... hilarious.

11. Me, too, sugar.

15. I do it quite frequently. Then I start to perspire and I remember. :( Gwoss.

20. Classic.

22. I had my fill by the day after Thanksgiving.

37. I want that, toooooo!! *jumps up and down*

43. Just say no.

46. Ima listen to that in a second. *nods*

62. Lucky!!! :)

Afro Diva said...

15. Been there done that, and its not a good thing

37. Does it even exist anymore. I'm not sure?

50. Don't say that, it would put me out of business!

61. Glad you have a new toy, I could tell you were enjoying it!

T.a.c.D said...

3. who you telling...my snuck isn't taking me literally either...

15. done that before

16. it sure the hell does

27. CLASSIC

33. sure didn't know that shyt...

61 FOR the RECORD DHL sucks AZZ and I can't wait until I FINALLY get my friggin ZUNE

Dude you SO made my night