Know Your Role (The Remix)

"You should be stronger than me..../Why'd you always put me in control?/All I need is for my man to live up to his role..../Always have to comfort you every day/But that's what I need you to do - are you gay?" - Amy Winehouse "Stronger Than Me"

I must admit that I was totally tapped for blog ideas in time for my weekly Monday post. On the way to work today I was listening to Amy Winehouse's first album "Frank" and this "Stronger Than Me" joint came on and it got me to thinking about the roles within a relationship. Plus Shan and Paula had both recently written something on the subject that got me to thinking too.

In October of '06 I originally wrote this blog (http://teejsays.blogspot.com/2006/10/know-your-role-2.html)
and so this is the remix. ;) Didnt know you could do that with blogs, didja? lol.

What I've learned since then is that some people prefer that the man lead and the woman submit. And when I hear it put like that I cant help but to think of a some overbearing dude running all over his woman. I realize that this probably couldnt be further from the truth, but thats always my immediate thought when I hear it put that way. Personally I think that it should be that both sexes do some leading and some submitting.

Im talking give and take people. Essentially I guess it boils down to the two people. It's all a matter of their experiences and views on the subject. Talk about some vital, need to know shit while getting to know a potential significant other!

Who knows exactly what Amy was going thru or the events that lead up to that lyric? Maybe dude just NEVER EVER stepped up and I can see how that could a problem. Like if she asked his opinion and he NEVER had an opinion. Just always gave a "Whatever you say hon.". It's like "Nigga do you got a backbone!?!?!? An idea of your own perhaps?". Some women like when the man orders for her at dinner. That may be her idea of him leading. I'd personally choke a bitch like that, but that's just me. I need my woman to have her own ideas, opinions and thoughts. I also need her to check me when I need checking. Dont just let me run wild. I can be doing a bit 4much (Thats 2 x too much for those of you not hip to the hip talk) at times.

I need a strong woman. A woman strong enough to fall back and let the man do it when she knows that she can do it just as well. But on the flipside the man should be secure enough to not be threatened if the woman can do it just as well. Take pride in that shit! You got you a winner, son!

The perfect couple to me would work like a well oiled machine. Filling in for each others deficiencies. Switching back and forth with the dominant/submissiveness and all. Holding each other down regardless. Truly having each other's back. The man protects and provides. The woman nurtures and supports. Or vice versa.

Again......give and take people. For real for real!

"Not 70/30, not 60/40, Im talking 'bout a 50/50 love.....yeah!" - Teddy Pendergrass "When Somebody Loves You Back"