Mostly comprised of shit that passed through my head and shit I just needed to get off my chest. So peek into my mind, you may be surprised at what you may find.
"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong." - Gandhi
I've recently been asked for forgiveness by someone. And while I'll refrain from airing out exactly what the offense was, just know that it's some shit you only see on TV. You never ever think you'll come across someone in real life bold enough to pull such shit.
So the question that Im posing to any viewing eyes along with myself is this : What is unforgivable? What determines the line to be crossed in which you know that you couldnt forgive someone?
Pretty much for me.....unless you kill my mom or any of my close fam and friends...in time I can usually forgive. I just think it's pointless harboring that much negative energy towards someone. Refusing to forgive is essentially allowing someone to have a power over you. I know I've had to forgive people in the past and I've had to ask for forgiveness as well. We all know of the term to 'Forgive and Forget'.....but is it possible?
I dunno about you, but having to cough up in excess of $150 million in a divorce settlement would NEVER make me this happy! Whatcha gon do with that cigar anyways Mike?
Angela forgets to put her cell on vibrate and it goes off while she is walking down the hall at school. Its her cousin who hasnt been to school the last couple days and who Angela had been trying to catch up with. So Angela takes the call....and of course at that very moment Dean Davis sees this and immediately confiscates the phone. So the schools cell phone policy is 'It is not to be used anywhere within the building.' Period. Consequences? The phone is kept in the school's posssession for 10 days or the phone can be retrieved by a parent or guardian (in this case that would be me!) and the student is suspended for 3 days! Ay yi yi...I didnt sign up for this shit! Kinda retarded I know, but these are their rules. I cant have Angela w/o her cell phone for 10 days. I bought it so I can keep up with her. We're gonna have to take the 3.
But here comes the crazy shit.............
Part 2
I go to the school yesterday (Wednesday 4/18/07) to claim the phone. As I approach the main entrance there is a girl who apparently is a student and went off campus for food and a pizza delivery guy walking up as well. The girl goes in first, then the pizza guy, and finally me. Do you know ALL 3 OF US SET OFF THE METAL DETECTOR? Do you know the off duty cop/security guard DIDNT FRISK NANN ONE OF US!?!?!?!?!? The girl went on her way. 'Security' dude pointed the pizza guy off in the direction he needed to go, then he got to me. I stated my business and he told me to wait right there and he would find the person I needed. He left met there for at least 10 minutes. Actually it was more like 15 before he came back with the person I needed..............and some muthafuckin cheese fries!!!!! I swear I wish I was making this up. Now it's what?....4 days after dude went crazy and killed 32 people and himself at Virginia Tech? There is no way in the world I should be able to walk into a high school in Chi-fucking-cago, set off the metal detector and not even been looked at twice!!! Aint no telling what harm I coulda did if I had wanted. To top it all off...while Im standing there waiting on dude to get back...a muthafucking OLDER WHITE DUDE IN A LEATHER TRENCH COAT walks in the door....and yup HE SET OFF THE METAL DETECTOR TOO! Im gonna go out on a limb and figure he was a teacher returning from lunch but still.....
The more and more I think on this....the more angrier I get. Im reporting this shit b/c Lord forbid some dumb shit happens at her school and mu'fuckas end up on camera for the local news crying and talking about "I dont know how something like this could've happened here".
1. "She be calling me 'Daddy'/I be calling her 'Mommy'/She be calling you 'Kelly'/when your name is 'Tommy'!" - R.Kelly "Im A Flirt"
2. I just think that is a fucking hilarious lyric
3. ...that and when T-Pain's mongoose looking ass sings something about being called 'Teddy Pinnedherassdown'
4. Straight comedy yo!
5. Can you believe R.Kelly will be 50 years old in ten years?
6. This Imus debacle is a tad weird b/c it's a shining example of the whole 'We can say it about ourselves but you cant' thing
7. Lord knows women of color have been called worse amongst ourselves
8. Still....his dumb ass shoulda known that shit wasnt gon ride
9. He been sneaking his lil sly ass pot shots in for years now..it was only a matter of time before the shit hit the fan for him
10. "(as far as sex, we) got them young girls faded before they even finish making their lame purchases at vicky secrets....word! i highly recommend to any man a thick chick who's older than you that knows how to cook some black eyed peas and greens an' shit" - T. Wizzle
11. Two weekends in a row I've had guests come up to me like "I left such and such in a cab but I dont know the cab number or which cab company it was. Can you help me?"
12. WTF??!!?!!? Are these people fucking serious?
13. Do you realize how many fucking cab companies there are that roam Chicago's streets? What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?
14. I think 'Fuck' and all of its variations is by far my favorite cuss word
15. It's really the most versatile
16. He was obviously pissed b/c his wife was all giggly and shit in my face and repeatedly touching me for absolutely no reason
17. I cant help it if Im young, black, handsome, charming and smart
18. "..dick is the bomb/'bout as thick as an arm/Mr. Exxon/Gas 'em with the wit and the charm" - Jay Z "Ride or Die"
19. Im obviously feeling myself here a bit
20. But for real...he shoulda fell back b/c she wasnt even sugar mama potential for me
21. And those are the only hotel guests I would flirt back with ;)
22. Dont worry....I do realize when Im being absurd
23. Geli I decided to keep my freak line to myself b/c then they'd all know!
24. Having the lady at Borders repeat my inquiry about the Lesbian Nation magazine over the loud speaker did not embarass me at all
25. For anyone that is interested...The Cubs suck!...They will always find a way to suck!
26. Even when they are winning and appearing not to suck...they will somehow return to Suck-dom...it's what they do
27. "I remember that time that you told me/you said 'Love is touching souls'/Surely you touched mine/Cause part of you pours out of me in these lines from time to time" - Joni Mitchell "A Case Of You"
28. I finally listened to my copy of Joni Mitchell's "Blue"
29. By far it's the saddest collection of music Ive ever heard!!!!
30. Do you realize that Sabrina LeBeauf, who played Sandra on The Cosby Show will be 50 next year?!?!?!?
31. Isnt that trippy?
32. And yes I said 'trippy' mostly b/c its my blog and I can do such things
33. Hello??? Lesley??? Stevie lyrics blog please?
34. Dude they literally served me a 40 oz. of water!
35. "You ever ate duck? That shit is tender nigga!" - BA
36. Is there really a rapper named Pimp Killa Thug?......the fuck?
37. Between that and T.I.'s Pimp Squad Click(P$C) we are getting dangerously close to the fictional group Pimp Trick Gangsta Click from Outkast's "Aquemini" album?
38. Seeing Fanai snap it out to that T-Pain song was like the highlight of my week
39. I wonder what it means that I felt that way after seeing that....
40. ...cause please dont tell me that it means THAT!!!
41. Why did my countless hours of internet surfing land me on a recipe for French Fry Spam casserole?
42. Dont worry Joy...Im gonna work on knowing when to open my hands and the such
43. "I want it with soy sauce baby! " - Joy
44. Unproductive repetitiveness is on my back and I need to shake it
45. RIP Kleo Barrett and Danielle's Mom
46. I cant stress enough how precious this life is and how living it to the fullest and making a difference somehow someway to somebody is an absolute must!
47. Go out and hug somebody why dont you?
48. Cant you go for a new Sade album right about now?
49. Her and Dre be tripping with this new album every 7 or so years non-sense
50. "but if yo arms look like a linebacker, you might not wanna go sleeveless.....we are firm believers in a bitch knowing her limitations and dressing accordingly" - Stephani SupaSTAR
So I walked into the studio and Deacon brings me some markers and the board and simply says "Write down everything you want to accomplish in this life", then walks away. What an incredible demand upon someone totally unsuspecting. I sat back a minute and thought about it. Then I started writing. This is what I came up with.....
In THIS life I must reach people!!! I must make a difference in the lives of EVERYONE that I spend more than 20 minutes talking to. I must lead by example. I must accept the fact that I have been blessed with multiple talents, and I mustnt be ashamed to display these talents. I have to remember that my playing small benefits no one!!! I must remain conscious of all that is around me. I must remember that BALANCE is the key to my life. And above everything else.... I must always remember to TRY!!!!!
P.S...........20 minutes? What the fuck do I be on?
So much on my mind and I wanted to blog but couldnt think of shit to blog. Or shall I say I havent been moved to blog shit....except for doing a list. I love doing the list, but I feel like they make me a lazy writer b/c they are so easy. Not sure if yall noticed but I typically do the lists like every 3rd blog. And plus I feel like people only skim the lists anyways. Anyways moving right along......
I just finished reading my friend Peppur's blog(www.imapeppur.blogspot.com)from top to bottom...or rather from botton to top and it is sooooo inspiring to me. Peppur is a midwestern girl who has been in LA for a few years now. Her blog chronicles all of her ups and downs as she strives to make her dream a reality. It's sooo far from a typical 'struggling actor in LA' thing. She writes with an emotion and wit that is intriguing and captivating. Shit...I hope someone somewhere says the same thing about my blog. So in reading all of the things that Peppur is simultaneously working on it inspired me to reaffirm all that I plan to accomplish in the near future. I decided to list them here.....not so much for you (although thats cool too), but more so for me to put this out in the atomsphere, ya know? Ready?....
*Solidy Superior Media Group's business foundation (website, seeing all the paperwork through, etc.) *Laurnea Show *Courtney's AD documentary screening) *Love Jones (Im kinda being top secret as to what this means but those who I've shared this thought with know what I mean) *Help BA get on track with what he wants to do *Get VIP-TV (or whatever we rename it) back up and running *Write short film script *Cast and shoot short film *Do a new spec script *Publish a book of poetry
That's all that comes to mind as far as my to do list for now. Trust that there is more. I am striving for 'Reniassance Man' stature.
THEY RELEASED SHAQUANDA!!!! About time....the rat bastards. Me and B were all excited and relieved like we were her parents. That shit is just foul for real. 7 years in prison for a shove? So after the story broke nationwide and thousands of blogs were written, and the governor of Texas and the judge of the case got flooded with calls, faxes, emails, inquiries, and some civil rights leaders got involved...the Texas Youth Commission (which is the states juvey prison system) brought in a special director to overlook things. Which is cool..but do you really need a specialist to tell you that a 14 yr old geting 7 years for a shove is fucked up? Anyways he came through and cleaned all that shit up immediately. Told them to release Shaquanda now dammit! They say it's about 400 other youth with unusually harsh sentences that he's about to release as well.
I spent all of today (Sunday 4.1.07) moving into my new place......which happens to be in the same building just 6 stories up. Angela and I handled most of everything. Dave came through and helped me with the bed and couch and TAADOW! 2 bedrooms bitches! Now I need a new bed b/c Ms. Thing politely let me know that she was taking my bed and that I need to more or less make arrangements. I fucking hate teenagers yo! lol.
Lastly.....Im so fuckin loving my new pics that my girl Deacon took. I only got two back thus far, but Im fucking geeked. Soulful, passionate, artsy, eclectic, yet my own flava. Fuck it....I may really fuck with this model thing this summer. We'll see if Tzo brings us some greenbacks in the Armour household.
Simply complicated. Moody. Loves people. True Scorpio. Extreme. Fiercely Loyal. Interested in alot. Slightly dyslexic. A smart ass who uses sarcasm as a crutch Possible ADD but I dont care.
I'm just trying to find my way in this big ol world, and at the same time trying to keep my sanity. Shouldnt be too hard, huh?