Monday, March 05, 2007

The "Helenova's Lemon Cake " List

1. "when i die i hope no one who ever hurt me cries
and if they cry i hope their eyes fall out
and a million maggots that had made up their brains
crawl from the empty holes and devour the flesh
that covered the evil that passed itself off as a person
that i probably tried to love" - Nikki Giovanni "When I Die"

2. Powerful, right?

3. I think I totally fucking despise the word 'chillaxin'

4. So Mike Jones is back it seems.....

5. ....and yup he's still very very terrible

6. "Who am I to judge ones perspective?/Though some of that shit yall pop...I aint relating/If I dont like it I dont like it/That dont mean that Im hating" - Common "The 6th Sense"

7. Did Janity really find my Mary from ANTM for me?

8. Janity I tell ya....between the silverware and now Mary I am forever in your debt

9. Speaking of ANTM.....Did ol girl really say that she let her girl borrow her weave, but then had to borrow it back so that she could wear it on the show?

10. Nah...she didnt really say that shit on TV, did she?

11. "You can tell a lot about a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." - Chuck Swindoll

12. Okay this probable dyslexia thing is kinda scaring me now

13. I mean I dont say I probably have dyslexia to be cute but Im having waaaaaaay too many typos and the such as of late

14. Why'd Mickey and Steven have to go and knock over Helenova's lemon cake anyways?

15. Bastards!

16. The simple fact is that I cant be everything to everyone no matter how are I try

17. And whenever I get that through my big head it wont be too soon

18. "Who gives a shit? Where's the literature? Gimme some verbiage hoe!!" - April

19. Dude my friends have the best random quotes ever!

20. And I love quoting you crazy MF's

21. How the hell does Anna Nicole get buried before James Brown and James died a full 2 months before she did?!?!?!?!?

22. And who the hell is her babydaddy any damn ways?

23. In This Week in NIGGERDOM....Pro football player Adam "Pacman" Jones decides to 'make it rain' on 'em at a Vegas strip club during All-Star weekend by bringing a GLAD BAG full of money

24. Of course all hell breaks loose when he starts throwing all this money and 3 people end up shot

25. I wish I were making that up!

26. Geli's date said he doesnt believe in outer space or dinosaurs b/c he cant see it

27. "Sometimes when we are generous in small, barely detectable ways it can change someone else's life forever" - Margaret Cho

28. Sending me random Stevie lyrics via text will always make me smile

29. How dope is it that Les never tires of my sometimes endless mushiness?

30. This Amy Winehouse chick might-could be the truth

31. Dont worry....I'll figure out a way to get us in there

32. I think I have a problem with the lyric 'I can do for you what Martin did for the people'

33. Martin who? I know you not talking about that Martin!

34. No B....actually I dont think you can chica

35. "I know Im ahead of my time/but Im behind on my rent/Asking Kanye for money just to pay on my gas bill/He ask me for it back/'Nigga brush up on ya math skills/Nothing + Zip = Zero!'/He couldnt relate/That nigga aint been broke since 'H to the Izzo'" - Rhymefest "Devil's Pie"

36. Morgan is sooooo gonna win the pretty baby contest

37. I peeped all the competition and they aint got jack on 'Lil Mo'

38. Would yall think I was crazy if I said Ive just made the goal of winning an Oscar, a Tony, a Emmy and a Grammy?

39. That and teaching myself to play acoustic guitar and piano

40. Can you say 'Tension so thick you have to cut it with a chainsaw'?

41. Between Angela burning the fuck outta that Rice-A-Roni and BA's soupy ass, needing a strainer Hamburger Helper....I dunno which of these fools is the worst cook

42. So is Musiq's "Buddy" like the sequel to "Jusfriends"?

43. As men we were taught to hold it in/That's why we don't know how 'til we're older men/If love is a place I'ma go again/At least now, now I know to go within...../It's a place I got to be/Loving you is loving me/How beautiful love can be/Gotta reach that frequency/Loving you is loving me/...Some say that Im a dreamer 'cuz I talk about it often..." - Common "Love Is"

44. Paula should be on Barack Obama's campaign staff

45. Just as long as his winning doesnt come down to her beating anyone at checkers ;)

46. I dont suppose doing my taxes online by myself was so bad

47. Still woulda rather had someone else do that shit though

48. And no Simone did not call me to see if I was okay b/c I didnt log onto myspace for a couple days

49. Remember?......Im a functioning addict

50. "When you look like a hobo and wail and flail like a hopeless bum...if you don't have one, you need a banjo. Chick had a banjo!" - Fanai

4 comments:

T.C. said...

Ok...so you know how I am about your list...but today Imma only comment on 2 items...

1. So TRUE...deep and real...like you said...Powerful....

43. So TRUE...deep and real...
naw just one more...I wish more people would think about love like this...that you have GOT to look within

35. but I gotta give it to him...being broke ain't NO joke...and I am totally feeling him...just got paid...and BROKE again...but hey the rent and lights are paid...so I can't complain...especially as cold as it is...at least I got some where warm to lay my head...

Curious1 said...

I gotta tell you brother. I heck your page all the time man. You definetly got some interesting thoughts goin on there. Stay up and continue writing your snippets. Very clever and commendable.

One

Shai said...

I can say you have a very interesting post.

j.a.c. said...

1. OH MY! I just got a book of Giovanni's poems. I haven't opened it yet. I wonder if that one's in there.

23. A GLAD bag? Noooo.. Shutup! Is that why there were so many police on the streets the next day?

42. The more I listen to that song, the more I despise it. So basically he just want to be friends with benefits. Did he really just ask if he can have sex with her and still just be her friend? You don't ask that kind of question Musiq!