Talking To The Mirror

"I fight with myself in the ring of doubt and fear/the rain aint gone, but I can still see clear" - Common Sense "Gaining One's Definition" 1997

I've got some living to do
and I'm tired of making excuses as to why I cant start
Its time I started coming up with reasons why I can
At a certain point you just get sick and tired
of being sick and tired
At least you should
I pray you all find that point
You do what you gotta do to motivate yourself
Lord knows aint nobody gon do it for you
It aint about greed
It aint about living how they live on TV
It shouldnt be anyways.
Its about doing for you
Doing for your fam
Doing something that you can be proud of
Something that you can speak loud of
Everyone has ideas
Believe it or not most of them are actually good
but the difference is in those who follow through
on their ideas and those who just continue to come up with ideas
So which one are you?

What's your mark on the world gonna be anyways?

You, Me & He (What We Gonna Do Baby?)

So Im reading this book, right? And it's about a lady discussing how she came to discover that she needed to be in a open marriage and how monogamy doesn't exactly work for her and the such. And so needless to say that this book has me thinking. Im almost scared as to what it means that Im agreeing with so much of what Im reading concerning her views on monogamy.

Funny how 'monogamy' and 'monotonous' are nearly the same word, huh? Things that make you go Hmmmm......

Anyways....I've always pictured in my head that I will marry a great woman and that will be that. Me and her til the wheels fall off. But temptation is a mu'fucka yall! That fine chick that you wanted to smash for the last 5 years always decides that she's ready to get down the day after you commit to your relationship. Such is life I suppose. Still doesnt make it any less fucked up though.

At this exact moment in time the thought of an open marriage, to me, is one of those things that sounds realllllllllly good in theory, but isnt actually practical. I mean the thought of me being able to get up with another chick when the feeling hit, with my girl fully knowing, and shit STILL BE OKAY?!?!?! Man the thought of that makes a nigga feel like this or maybe even this, but the flipside of that is that your girl can do the same. Im a jealous scorpio. The thought of another dude smashing my girl isnt a pleasant one. And so yeah...no open marriage for me I dont think.

Or is it? Yall know I always say that I want that 'Ossie and Rubie Dee' love, right? Well if you didnt know, they apparently had an open marriage. So what does that say? I dunno. Shit is confusing yo.

What say you?

Is monogamy natural?

Is all the talk of those who say it's "not natural" just a cop out by people who wanna have their cake and eat it too?

What do you REALLY think about open marriages?

The "Babymama's Terrorist Fist Jab" List

1. "Sometimes I think I'm from another world/When I try to tell a woman just exactly where I stand at/I want a girl when I want a girl/And when I don't want a girl I want a girl who understands that/And that's some hard shit to explain/to a woman that's in love with you/It's a pitiful thing..." - Phonte (Little Brother) "Slow It Down"

2. I swear I be giving yall my life in these here lists

3. This shit more or less equates to therapy for me

4. It's how I get all the thoughts in my head from ganging up and jumping me

5. So Puffy is back to being Puffy again?

6. Honestly I never really referred to him as 'Diddy' so it makes me no nevermind

7. Crazy rarely realizes that it's crazy.

8. And with that said....who's to say what crazy truly is?

9. But still....sometimes you just know

10. "...Until I had to figure/That I don't wanna play around, but I don't wanna settle down/And that's a man's dilemma/'Cause every man remembers how his daddy and his uncles did it/'Cause more than likely that's the way they're gonna do it/I know it sounds fucked up and most wont admit it/But yo, I gotta face it 'cause I know I'm living through it" - Phonte (Little Brother) "Slow It Down"

11. *sigh*.......my life!

12. Remember when Michelle gave Barack dap on stage after he pretty much clinched the nomination?

13. Yeah...that got referred to as a 'Terrorist Fist Jab' by Fox News' E.D. Hill

14. LOL @ fucking clueless white people!...it's called a POUND and/or DAP

15. LMAO at news coverage calling it 'Fist bump', 'Closed fist high five', 'Knuckle Bump' and everything else these idiots came up with

16. Oh and then Michelle got referred to (again by the fabulous Fox News) as Barack's babymama....nevermind the fact that they been married how many years now......before they had kids? WTF?

17. I say all that to say....the back and forth between HillBilly and Barack was essentially in-house fighting compared to the shit McCorpse McCain and the GOP are gonna pull so brace yourselves yall

18. "Tomorrow is never promised so it's quite a good look to tell someone you love them today." - Jonesy

19. Kelli Im glad ur here hon. Shit like that lets you know that you are truly here for a reason, ya know?

20. Purchasing a hot single by a flossy, semi-famous "ballin" rapper via itunes...... $.99

21. Watching said rapper and crew struggle to pony up a a few hundred dollars to rent a room in your hotel...... PRICELESS!!!!

22. Then seeing said rapper and crew being forced to ask their bust downs/groupies to use their credit cards to check in b/c none of them have any........DOUBLE PRICELESS!!!

23. I swear you couldnt pay me to make this shit up!

24. Sitting around waiting for inspiration to strike is pretty pointless

25. You gotta be proactive and find a way

26. At the end of the day all you really got to rely on is you

27. "I'd put that on my wedding invite entitled 'We Gon Be Fucking Forever Yall : So Watch What You Invite Us To!'. That quote will be in calligraphy...all fancy and shit" - Chante

28. I dunno about yall, but if I got an wedding invite with that title I would MAKE SURE I'm there!

29. Believe it or not....this might very well be the most difficult list I ever put together

30. This shit took me forever.....stuff would come and go before I could add it

31. So Steen was like.....'I just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking about you today. It's Father's Day and I know you lost your dad so you're in my thoughts'

32. To which I replied.....'Thats really sweet of you but I aint thinking about that nigga. Is that mean? I kinda feel bad for not feeling bad. I actually have a couple of friends on my mind who lost their dad within the last year so Im feeling bad for them.'

33. I actually do feel bad for not really feeling bad. Such is my reality I suppose

34. There's obviously unresolved issues there that I need to tend to.....eventually

35. "Fast food got me sick!/These mu'fuckas think they slick/by trying to make this bullshit afforadable..." - Cee Lo Green (Goodie Mob) "Soul Food"

36. No...for real! Eating right is hard! And expensive!!!!

37. Im tempted to say 'Fuck it. Somebody is just gon have to love me, fat belly and all!'

38. LMAO @ KY Jelly holder on the wheelchair

39. I really have no words about the R.Kelly verdict other than that I hope gets some help now that he has dodged that big ass bullet that I was sure was gonna lay him flat

40. What else is there to say other than when Phonte of Little Brother said.. 'The social hierarchy according to the American legal justice system goes something like this: Dead dogs >>>>> bullet riddled Black men >>>>>> sexually abused Black girls' in his blog entitled "Would R.Kelly Be In Jail If He Had Pissed On A Dog?"?

41. Speaking of LB....did they sneak a new album out without my knowledge??!!?!?

42. Everytime I find myself rushing to get the dishes done before roomie comes home it reminds of rushing to get them done before my mama came home. I have to remind myself that 'Im grown as hell, dog'.

43. "Never give up on a dream just because of the length of time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway." - Life's Little Instruction Book Vol. 3

44. I fucking love that book.

45. Sad Reality of Life : Stupid people procreate at a far faster rate than Smart people are capable of

46. And this is so mostly b/c smart people got shit to do other than just fucking

47. God bless Myshell and her family and Tim Russert's too

48. Cindy Im so thankful that your mom is now cancer free!

49. Viva la WINFEST......another great one in the books!

50. "I hate Verizon. I hope they all get fucking syphillis!" - Lesley

Al Sharpton for VP!!!!!

While Im literally ecstatic that Barack will be the Democratic nominee for President, I am now fearful for him and his family.

Shout out to Fox Brown Fox. She blogged that Obama should be protected by Black Gangster Disciples, Black P Stones, El Rukns, Four Corner Hustlers, Gangster Disciples, Imperial Gangsters, Imperial Vice Lords, La Familia, La Raza, Latin Kings
Latin Queens, Maniac Latin Disciples, Mickey Cobras, Sisters of the Struggle, Vice Lords, Bloods & Crips, Irish Republican Army, Chicago Teamsters from the 80s, La Cosa Nostra, TD Jakes' Women that have been Loosed, National Organization of Women, Lesbians with Guns, Trannies with Poison Darts, and Drag Queen Super Heroes.

And I couldnt agree more.

Let's face it. This country, and even the world in general, but mostly this country, has shown us over and over again that if you shine too brightly, think too radically, try to do too much right, or make too much damn sense, they have no problem taking you out. Think Medgar, Malcolm, Martin, John or Bobby Kennedy to name a few.

And speaking of Bobby Kennedy.....Im not feeling Hill as the VP at all. This dirty bitch may plot to have him "taken care of" so she can step right in. Sounds far fetched, but shit not really. She has proven that there really isnt a new low that she wont stoop to.

And that leads me back to the brother with the perm. Al Sharpton needs to be Barack Obama's running mate for the simply fact that any would be harm do'ers will think twice b/c Lord knows they dont want that nigga to be President!

And that may make you chuckle a bit, but a good part of me is dead serious.

In The News 6.02.08

This Obama/Trinity thing is weird. On one hand, it aint like Rev. Wright or Father Pfleger lied in anything they said. But I guess something is to be said for timing. Especially with Rev. Wright's 2nd flare up and now Father Pfleger. There is no question that they are for Obama. But they saw the backlash that was faced when Rev. Wright's first sermon hit the airwaves. So for Father Pfleger to go into Trinity, knowing all eyes were still on the church, AND that they do live video streaming across the net, and say what he said, might coulda been a bit of a dumb ass move. And again...he shole aint never lied, but timing yall, timing! Wait til the nomination is completely locked up. You know white folks cant handle the straight up truth like that!

Did 50 burn down his own damn multi-million dollar home to force his babymama out? Did ol girl figure 'since you want me out so bad aint NOBODY finna live in this bitch!!'? Im not sure which way it was. But the fact that the house went up in flames like it did is maaaaaaaaaaaaaad suspicious. If you are unfamiliar, 50 wanted his babymama out by the end of the school year. He said she has a bunch of people living in there, of which he isn't (and shouldn't be) responsible to pay for. She says he promised her the house and since it's hers she can pretty much do as she pleases. Tricky situation indeed. What's obvious though is one of them got tired of the constant back and forth and had someone torch the place. Ol girl and her kids (including 50's 10 yr old son) all were treated for minor smoke injuries. I think whomever simply wanted the culprits to set one part of the house ablaze and cause a little damage, but said culprits went overboard and damn near killed er'body inside! This one is gonna be interesting to see as the truth comes out.

Kimbo Slice had his network TV debut over the weekend. If you are unfamiliar he is a former street fighter/web phenom who just turned pro in Mixed Martial Arts league. There was a huge "debate" as to whether WHITE PEOPLE OVER THE AGE OF 35 America was ready to see him on prime time TV. You know...Big Scary Black Man and all. The only thing is......THIS NIGGA IS REALLY FUCKING SCARY! It aint like the LeBron cover thing. This is the real deal. Dude is terrifying. You see the picture, right? Wouldn't you try to stay on his good side too? I love the Lil Wayne lyric "I aint never ran from a nigga / and I damn sure aint bout to pick today to start running", but uhhhh....dude looks like he can retrieve the bitch outta just about anybody. Im not sure there are enough digits you could put on a check to get me in the ring with son, but that's just me.